Wednesday, July 19, 2006
An Easy Mark, True
So apparently, National is having an image crisis.
Bad enough, it would seem, for them to seek the help of top US Republican advisor Kenny 'Jiggy' Huggins, a highly-rated spin doctor often employed to help the GOP get it's collective finger back on the pulse of modern youth. In soon-to-be-released publicity stills that have not passed the watchful eye of Brash's new 'Director of Forward Reconnaisance,' Gareth Spillane, Brash and right hand man Gerry Brownlee are seen with Huggins in a number of 'hip-hop' type poses carefully calculated to engage and excite young Kiwis.
Spillane, or 'mah seeing-eye dawg' as Brash has taken to calling him, may wish he did get a first pass at National's radical upcoming image shift. 'Jiggy' Huggins has advocated wide-ranging wardrobe changes, titular modifications throughout the National caucus, and the wholesale adoption of a street-savvy 'ebonics' argot that Huggins is 'straight up, fo' real' certain will speak honestly to today's youth.
In the above leaked shot, rumoured for usage in various print media, Dr Brash (or 'Brash Love' as he now refers to himself) is seen with Huggins and Brownlee ('tha Obsequious F.A.T.'). When confronted about the image, the employment of Huggins with public funds, and the alleged arming of his 'Political Correctness Eradicator' with an AK-47, Brash crossed his arms, thrust out his chin, and announced that he had no further comment for 'all y'all'.